Thursday, April 16, 2009

Thoughts

My kids are in art class, and I am doing a hundred and one things. Writing the weekly newsletter, grading, thinking about the service project I just found out I'm in charge of, and thinking about how I'm not good at keeping in touch anymore. Maybe I was never good. I don't know. Being a teacher makes me 100 jajillion times worse. Please, friends far and near, know that I love you. I stink at calling people back. And emailing them back. Honestly, sometimes I'm so busy that I don't even realize I might not be connecting with people. Does anyone else feel this way?

I'm also listening to this song by Bethany Dillon, which just may be my favorite song. It's so, so beautiful. I found it when I got back from India, and it hit me in a place so hidden I barely even knew it existed. It's such a poignant picture of who God is. When I got back from Kolkata, there were days I felt like God was on the opposing side. Pretty pompous of me. Sort of Job-esque. But this song jolted me back to truth--that GOD IS ON OUR SIDE. He didn't have to come. He didn't have to die. In the middle of all the shocking, heart-stopping pain of the world, He came. He entered into our existence. If you have not heard this song, please go to Bethany's myspace page and listen to it. For free! http://myspace.com/bethanydillonmusic

I feel sick after reading cnn.com. I try to go every few days, but I always leave with dread in my pit. There's an old song by Waterdeep that says, "Sometimes, God, I feel like I’m living in a bone grinding mill/And every time I hear the sound I can barely stand still/It’s a thing I can’t quite make out sometimes but it seems to keep getting louder."

An image came to mind the other day after reading the news. Frodo of Tolkien fame, looking into the ball. The evil eye blazing back, shaking him so deeply that he falls to the floor. Somedays, the world just feels so heavy. You know?

Maybe that's why I'm listening to Bethany Dillon. You know, the triumphs of the Kingdom--the daily, hourly sowing of the Gospel--don't make the news. The bone-grinding mill isn't the only story.

Here's the song. Peace out.

The orphan clings to Your hand
Singing the song of how he was found
The widow rejoices
For her oppressors are silenced now

You sit at the table with the wounded and the poor
You laugh and share stories with the thief and the whore
When You could just be silent and leave us here to die
Still, You sent Your Son for us
You are on our side

The runaway falls at Your feet
You are what he has searched for
The rich man is broken
When he stands beneath a sky full of stars

You sit at the table with the wounded and the poor
You laugh and share stories with the thief and the whore
When You could just be silent and leave us here to die
Still, You sent Your Son for us
You are on our side

Still, You sent Your Son for us
You are on our side
Still, You sent Your Son for us
You are on our side

1 comment:

  1. i realized I haven't read your blog for nearly 2 months! For some reason the link on my page to yours is no more and so my reminder is gone. Out of sight, out of mind, right?
    ANyway, I'm sitting in a coffee shop in the OP (overland park where bob lives) and waiting for him to get off work...and I am updating the guest list and addresses and I thought "I need to read Lara's blog!" It seemed very, very important. I'm so glad I did. I love reading your thoughts. I say "Amen sister."
    And I Love it that you watch American Idol. Have you seen the one on Utube of the cute lady in Britain who blew everyone away this past week, Susan Boyle? Look it up. YOu'll grin. (There's is called "Britain's Got Talent")
    I love you and so glad I got to see you and Aaron if ever so briefly last Saturday. I'll be home in a month! Yay!

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